Business Briefing: Vet doula helps pet parents say goodbye

For more than 15 years Enzo, a Chihuahua Miniature Pinscher mix breed rescue, was a near constant companion for my husband and myself. He traveled the country with us and became the unofficial “newshound” of the Bay Area Reporter due to his weekly Tuesday morning visits to the newsroom.

Dealing with various health issues the last several years, Enzo began to slow down and show signs of his elderly age for a canine, having turned at least 16 this past February. His eating habits changed in the spring, when we learned he was in the advanced stages of kidney disease.

In a way, we lucked out with having prior notice that our time with Enzo was coming to an end. It allowed my husband and I to prepare for the eventual day when we would need to say a last goodbye to our beloved pup and discuss how we wanted those final moments of his life to transpire.

We knew we didn’t want it to be at the offices of his veterinarian, as caring and loving the staff had been to Enzo over the years of his being their patient. Should he not go quietly in his sleep then we hoped to allow him to die at home and decided on the determinants to lead us to call on the services of a pet death doula.

That time came last month when Enzo refused to eat any foods. Thus, we scheduled a home visit for the afternoon of August 27 with Ken Gorczyca, DVM, a companion animal end-of-life doula with the in-home pet euthanasia service A Gentle Rest.

Gorczyca talked us through the process and asked us myriad questions about Enzo and the times we shared with him. Once we said one last goodbye, Gorczyca wrapped Enzo under a blanket in a basket and invited my husband to walk him out to his car, where he had set up his trunk with a circle of flowers and flameless candles.

“I look at wrapping them in a blanket and putting them in a basket like shrouding them,” explained Gorczyca, who described the service he provides as “not a funeral. It is a sacred goodbye.”

Gorczyca, a gay man who helped found Pets Are Wonderful Support, or PAWS, at the start of the AIDS epidemic to help pet owners living with HIV or dying from AIDS care for their animals, turned to veterinary palliative care more than four years ago. He received a companion animal end-of-life doula professional certificate from the University of Vermont and reached out to his friend Ari E. Rozycki, DVM, who had launched A Gentle Rest, to go work for him at the practice.

“This is my calling,” said Gorczyca, 68, an Army brat born in Philadelphia who lived all over growing up, eventually settling in Salinas, California. “For me, personally, I don’t know these people but I get to be invited into their homes during a very emotional moment. I am able to offer them myself and allow them to go through this transition.”

He had graduated from UC Davis with a B.S. in atmospheric science in 1979 and a doctor of veterinary medicine degree in 1983, having come out of the closet in 1981. Early in his career, Gorczyca worked for several veterinary clinics in San Francisco while volunteering with PAWS as its education director.

“At the time, physicians were telling their patients with AIDS that they should give up their pets because of a fear of illness. We didn’t know what was causing AIDS at the time, and a lot of the illnesses people with AIDS got were also in pets,” recalled Gorczyca, who disagreed with such advice. “As a vet, I knew the power of the human and pet bond. I remember thinking I don’t want to tear them apart from their pets when they are dying.”

Having lost more than 300 friends and associates who died of AIDS, Gorczyca served as an end-of-life doula for many.

“I didn’t realize a human illness would so affect my career, but it became obvious that would become my career,” he recalled.

Himself a long-term HIV survivor, Gorczyca was forced into an early retirement in 1991 when his own health faltered. Eventually, with the advent of drugs that turned HIV into a manageable disease, Gorczyca was able to return to his profession. Time he had spent in the desert environment of Southern California to think about his next career pursuit led him to focus on end-of-life work with pets and their owners.

“It is a deep-rooted thing for me to do this work,” said Gorczyca, who now teaches at the Vermont certificate program and lectures about pet euthanasia.

Fairly new field
The pet doula field is fairly new, though Gorczyca noted decades ago most pets died at home. It mirrors the growing desire of people wanting to die at home and not at the hospital, he said.

“Animals are teaching us the privilege to die at home with our family,” said Gorczyca.

As with end-of-life care for humans, euthanasia can be a difficult topic for pet owners to discuss let alone experience. Gorczyca tries to bring solace amid the grief for his clients and will meet them inside their homes, backyards or even the beach or a park that was a special place in the life of their pet.

“I have been to many events where the people will have 10 people there who all loved this animal and want to be there to release their spirit. It allows for a lot of flexibility,” said Gorczyca, noting other pets can also be present for the service. “The way I look at it, I bring in ceremony and ritual. I think that is really important.”

He will read a poem about letting go and conduct a brief ceremony once the pet has passed involving sandalwood and the ringing of chimes. Using the answers to the questions he asks at the start of his visit, Gorczyca will create a poem and song unique to the pet that he sends to the owners shortly after he has left.

“These heart songs are what I call them. Every animal, every relationship has a song, and you can help acknowledge that,” he said.

The roughly 60-minute service costs roughly $1,100 depending on the urn chosen if an owner wants their pet’s cremated remains to be returned to them. If not, they can have their pet’s ashes scattered at sea. On their behalf, a donation is made to a local nonprofit that cares for pets such as PAWS.

A homeowner in Guerneville for 41 years, Gorczyca splits his time between the LGBTQ resort town in the North Bay and his home in San Francisco with his husband, Lorenz Obwegeser, and Kira, their 5-year-old Rat Terrier Whippet mix breed. Earlier this year, he launched his own in-home pet euthanasia service called A Beloved Farewell focused on Sonoma County since Rozycki’s practice doesn’t cover that part of the Bay Area.

“I get to meet amazing, amazing animals on their death bed and the humans that loved them. There is nothing more I could ask for at work, I find it really fulfilling,” said Gorczyca.

An artistic coming out
A painter since childhood, Gorczyca in his adult years has gravitated toward a plein air style and focuses on natural landscapes and animal portraiture. In addition to taking commissions to paint people’s pets, Gorczyca usually travels to Death Valley twice a year to focus on his artwork, often joining in a desert fast or other program offered by the School of Lost Borders.

“I love the desert and love the open vistas,” said Gorczyca, who leaves his cellphone behind and just brings his paints and communes with nature, “allowing my art to happen.”

He is currently working on his first public art installation at senior dog rescue Muttville’s new facility at 750 Florida Street in San Francisco. He is painting a series of nine dogs in the nonprofit’s education room. 

And he is taking part in his first SF Open Studios this year, opening up his home art studio in Corona Heights the first weekend of the event on September 20 and 21. See his listing for location details.

He will have canvas prints for sale priced at $325, while his original works cost $900 to $1,500.

“I just am coming out of the closet as an artist,” quipped Gorczyca, who had his first solo art show three years ago at the National History Institute in Prescott, Arizona.

To request a vet doula via A Gentle Rest, visit its website.

For those in Sonoma County who want to engage Gorczyca’s services, visit his A Beloved Farewell site. Information about Gorczyca’s artworks and pet portraits can be found here. 

UPDATED 9/10/25 to correct the year that Ken Gorczyca came out of the closet.

Got a tip on LGBTQ business news? Call Matthew S. Bajko at (415) 829-8836 or email [email protected].
 
Full disclosure: Matthew S. Bajko and his husband received no special treatment in the services for their dog.